How Do I Calculate Our Separation Date?

Your separation date is the date that you first told her (or she told you, or you both agreed) that you wanted to separate/get a divorce.

On August 28th, my husband told his ex that he wanted a divorce. She filed for legal separation 2 months later on October 28th. He countered with divorce papers 3 weeks later on November 21st. Their first court date was December 5th. He moved out later that day. Even though he didn’t move from their marital home for more than 3 months, the Court set August 28th as their separation date because that's when he'd first told her that he wanted a divorce.

So if you're seriously considering a divorce, you should lock the date in by telling her of your intentions, and then write it down. In fact, start writing everything down from this point forward (see "Document, Document, Document").